


Smile While You Suffocate

by WhoopsOK



Series: all they wanted was violence [1]
Category: Grand Theft Auto V, Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Grand Theft Auto Setting, Background Poly, Background Relationships, Breathplay, Choking, Explicit Consent, First Time, Grinding, Gym Sex, Implied Gavin Free/Michael Jones, M/M, Minor Violence, Self-Defense
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-02
Updated: 2020-03-02
Packaged: 2021-02-26 14:07:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,291
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22981972
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WhoopsOK/pseuds/WhoopsOK
Summary: "You have the kind of smile that makes people want to choke you,” Ryan answers without missing a beat, making Michael and Geoff crack up from across the room. “I’d prefer you know how to deal with that.” He doesn’t add on that it’s basically essential to his wellbeing now.(Ryan teaches Gavin some self-defense and Gavin winds up really, really enjoying himself.)
Relationships: Gavin Free/Ryan Haywood, Minor or Background Relationship(s)
Series: all they wanted was violence [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1834024
Comments: 14
Kudos: 81





	Smile While You Suffocate

**Author's Note:**

> I’m taking krav maga and, hey, for all my other touched-starved, angry people out there? 100% recommend it for stress relief, exercise, human contact, etc.
> 
> In short: this is a thirst fic, dude. I spend a lot of time getting punched and choked and yanked around, it’s honestly exasperating my fight kink. I know how to get out of several chokeholds, but sometimes think… what if I just _didn’t_, so here we go!
> 
> Title from “Choke” by IDKHow But They Found Me

It occurs to Ryan that less than a year ago, he would’ve been offended by how easily he’s approached these days.

The Vagabond is not someone you contact casually, most of the time he’s not someone you seek out to _at all_. The rumors are not oversold; he’s done a lot of horrible things in his life and honestly doesn’t remember his kill count well enough to dispute it. The gore and violence of this job don’t bother him so, no, he doesn’t flinch. He makes the kill and brings back whatever piece is requested as evidence; he does the hard interrogations, makes the bodies disappear after. Everybody knows that, associates his mask with suffering and death. His whole schtick sort of depends on it.

It also occurs to Ryan, though, that less than a year ago, the idea of having friends would’ve been absurd.

And yet, it’s 3am on an otherwise unremarkable Tuesday when—walking out of the shower after a long and bloody job—that he realizes, abruptly, that he’s got _loved ones._ Jack and Geoff aren’t waiting outside his door for a debrief, their shoulders come down the second they see Ryan. They were just waiting to make sure he was okay. Michael wakes him up a few hours later, pretending it’s because he’s a tool and just can’t bother to be quiet, but it’s mostly just to make sure he isn’t concussed. Jeremy doesn’t hesitate to touch him the next day because he’s still scared of him, he just doesn’t want to make any injuries any worse.

Gavin doesn’t hesitate to touch him at all, grabbing his hand after their recap. “You have a callous,” he says, rubbing his thumb back and forth over the rough part of Ryan’s knuckles.

Ryan raises his eyebrows, but doesn’t take his hand back. “That tends to happen when you _punch_ things for a living.” He thinks, in a flash, of the horrible things he’d do to anyone who hurt this crew, _his _crew. He’s looking at the bruise on Gavin’s cheek. Gav had put a bullet in the guy’s head shortly following getting it; there’s nothing left for Ryan to do. Still, his hand is tingling under Gavin’s. “You should come train with me.”

“Why?” Gavin laughs. “So I can be the thing you punch?”

“No, because you have the kind of smile that makes people want to choke you,” Ryan answers without missing a beat, making Michael and Geoff crack up from across the room. “I’d prefer you know how to deal with that.” He doesn’t add on that it’s basically essential to his wellbeing now.

Gavin is still laughing, too, but he sits back to give Ryan a considering look. “Rye Bread, I’m starting to think you like me.”

“It’s just annoying to rescue you every time you run your fucking mouth,” Michael tells him and Jeremy looks up long enough to add on, “Because you run your mouth _a lot_.”

Ryan doesn’t get in the middle of it when they start shouting at each other, because he knows well by now that their disfunction is mostly for sport. A few minutes later, his hand is cold without Gavin holding it and Gavin himself is in a neat little pretzel under Michael.

“_Say uncle, bitch!_”

“_Ryaaaan_,” Gavin calls instead.

“If you trained with me, you’d probably be able to get out of that,” Ryan replies pitilessly.

“_Ryan!!_”

Ryan sips his coke and remains seated.

*

Gavin doesn’t mind the thought of training with Ryan, actually.

None of them got into this business without knowing how to come out the other side of a fight by putting the other guy in the ground, but Gavin knows he’s physically the weakest link. He’s a decent shot when he has to be, but spending most of the time behind the scenes means he doesn’t often have to be. They never send him out when they need heavy hitters; he’s the grift and overwatch to their muscle. Sure, sure, he could stand to learn to throw a better punch or break a chokehold, why not? And he likes Ryan!

They start training at 6am with the promise that Ryan will make him breakfast promptly at 10am if he gives it his all.

It takes about 2 minutes for Gavin to think his all might not be enough.

The warm up leaves him sweaty with sore knuckles. Nothing unfamiliar, no big deal, but then Ryan makes good on his promise to make sure Gavin knows how to deal with people choking him.

Normally, Gavin is good at compartmentalizing.

There’s always been a touch, just a _tiny _bit of masochism to him. It’s the kind of thing that makes friendly violence fun. Michael wailing on him with foam swords is entertaining, Geoff surprising him with a nut shot is all for a laugh. If he leans on his masochism hard enough, it can be the sort of thing that makes him smile through interrogations that involve getting punched in the face and threatened with guns. But even that’s more persona, more _bravado_ than anything else. He never enjoys that part, really, not more than the vicious satisfaction of knowing his captors are about to die a painful death when his crew gets to him. There’s always been a firm line between amusement while his friends hurt him and trying to stay alive while talking shit to their enemies.

Sparring apparently blurs that line right to oblivion, it does.

They start with chokes from the back, so Gavin can only hope Ryan has no clue how wildly distracting he finds it. Ryan’s hands are big and rough around his neck and Gavin is overly aware of it even as they squeeze, even when they’re shoving him forward and he has to struggle to turn around and make fight. It’s worse when they move to arm chokes and wind up pressed together from shoulder to hips, the whole strong line of Ryan’s body against his back.

It takes a lot to get Ryan to let go—and it still is _letting go_. Gavin has always known but now has the intimate knowledge that Ryan could kill him barehanded in short of three minutes. The fact that Ryan is giving him tools to add a few extra seconds to that would be touching if he wasn’t focused so hard on not getting thrown to the ground.

As a matter of fact, Gavin manages to reign in his focus all through the static chokes from the front, interspersed with laughter at his own expense. He even manages when Ryan shoves him backwards and he has to scramble to keep his feet under him. But when they start to practice chokes against a wall, Gavin’s brain short circuits on him.

Ryan has actually been a surprisingly patient teacher and walked him through exactly what his reaction should be. It shouldn’t be a surprise when Ryan shoves him against the wall by the neck. Gavin was watching him approach and he knew what to do. _Hands back to break his fall, one arm up, one shoulder down, drop his elbow, fight for all he’s worth._ The blueprint is in his head.

And yet, Gavin stands there losing air, blood rushing to all the wrong places. Pinned against a wall, it’s impossible to ignore how good it feels to be completely at the mercy of someone who could _kill him_, but never would. It’s impossible to ignore how _this is_ _Ryan_ and Gavin has maybe thought (once or twice or a dozen times) about what sort of things Ryan’s hands could do to him.

Gavin’s cock is filling out in his pants and there isn’t a thing he can do to stop it.

Ryan pauses visibly, face quirking in confusion when Gavin doesn’t react, but he doesn’t stop squeezing. “You’re gonna run out of air in a second here,” he warns. It’s the worst thing he can possibly do short of moving in closer.

…Which is exactly what he does next.

It puts them pressed together from chest to thigh, Ryan’s waist pinning Gavin’s against the wall further restricting his movement. It also makes him acutely aware of what is, most definitely, not a gun in Gavin’s pocket.

Shocking Ryan is hard to do, but Gavin clearly manages it. Because Ryan lets go like he’s been scalded, eyebrows jumping up to his hairline when Gavin’s eyes roll back in his head and not because he’s dying.

Gavin gasps blinking the spots from his eyes to find Ryan wide-eyed and slack-jawed. “I—shit. I don’t—” He goes to make a break for it, but Ryan’s arm shoots out before he can, hand thudding against the wall by Gavin’s shoulder. Gavin thinks of trying one of the new breaks Ryan taught him, but is trembling too hard to want to try his luck at this particular moment.

“So, ah… how much of that is for _me_?” Ryan asks, flabbergasted but not appalled, at least.

Slightly panicked, Gavin angles for a conman’s grin, cheeky and false-confident. “All of it, if you’re—” The awkward surprise on Ryan’s face caves into a warning glare so quickly Gavin’s stomach drops. He lets his face twist as uncomfortably as it wants. “Most of it, I don’t get off on strangers roughing me up.”

“What if I got Michael in here?” Ryan challenges.

“Boi’s a softy in bed,” Gavin tells him, shrugging self-consciously at the renewed surprise on Ryan’s face. “He’s also not here.”

They look at each other for the span of a few breaths before Ryan’s hands come back up to Gavin’s throat. They rest there softly, not squeezing at all and Gavin shivers at the touch. “If you fight back, I’m gonna stop.” It’s an offer.

It has Gavin’s cock throbbing in his pants. He puts his hands flat against the wall, tips his chin up in the exact way he was just taught not to. He still makes an embarrassingly squeaky sound when Ryan presses down. Gavin opens his mouth, fingertips scrabbling at the wall behind him, but he doesn’t struggle. He looks Ryan in the eyes as his lips go slightly numb, as his vision waters. Ryan is looking at him with more intensity than they’ve ever shared, visibly cataloging every reaction. He licks his lips when he lets up enough for Gavin to suck in one frantic breath, barely letting it out at all before Ryan is squeezing again. He tries to breathe faster the next time Ryan releases him, but Ryan is giving him increasingly short breaths of air.

Before long, Gavin’s whole face is tingling and he’s soaked through the front of his briefs. It feels like it’s been ages since the last time Ryan let him breathe and his heart is pounding in his chest, something like fear wrapping around his arousal as Ryan just leans on his throat, likely feeling his Adam’s apple bobbing uselessly under his hands. He’s leaned in close enough that Gavin’s eyes are practically crossing to see him even as his vision is starting to grey out—

Finally, Gavin thrashes with his whole body and Ryan lets him go with his hands only to grab on with his teeth, his full weight pressing Gavin against the wall as he bites down on the side of his neck. Gavin’s panicked flail turns into a desperate roll, gripping at Ryan’s clothes as his hips jerk, moaning and heaving for breath with stars flashing behind his eyes as he _comes_.

“Oh _fuck,_” Gavin croaks, contorted in Ryan’s space, Ryan’s body the only thing keeping him upright. He’s dizzy and trembling, the orgasm tapering off instead of ending, leaving him twitching with pleasure and unfocused.

At least until Ryan takes a half-step back, just enough to get his hand between them and shove down his pants. He throws his cup on the ground carelessly to take himself in hand.

“Oh,” Gavin breathes faintly watching Ryan quickly jack himself off, breath coming short against Gavin’s face. He brings his eyes up to find Ryan’s staring at him, eyes blown dark and wanting. “_Oh, Ryan,_” he says again and Ryan’s mouth falls open. Living on impulses has not always worked out for Gavin, but sod it, he can’t quite help leaning forward to kiss Ryan soundly.

It turns out to be a good choice because Ryan immediately groans against his mouth and shudders all over, coming across the front of Gavin’s pants.

Gavin pulls back first, Ryan chasing after his lips for a flattering second before he catches himself. His face is warm under Gavin’s hands when he reaches up to cup his cheeks.

“Lovely Ryan,” he rasps and has the wonderfully unique privilege of seeing The Vagabond look _sheepish_.

“Alright, that was… several HR violations all at once,” Ryan says.

Gavin guffaws until Ryan laughs at him, too, a bright and startling sound he’s never heard before, face twisted with mirth.

“I’ll be sure to—to write up a report to Geoff.” Gavin giggles, wiping his eyes. “Shit. He’d probably just wank off to it, though, _Christ_, Ryan.”

That, of all things, makes Ryan blush. It’s the cutest thing. Gavin kisses him again, just because he can. “You are lovely.”

“Thank you,” Ryan replies then, a little stiltedly, “You’re… lovely, too?”

Gavin laughs. “Now get off me, you jizzed on my sweats.”

“Sorry about that,” Ryan says, not sounding all that sorry. “I’ll aim more carefully next time.”

That sends a lovely thrill down Gavin’s spine, so he doesn’t bother with being coy about Ryan’s assumption that there’s going to be a next time. He just kisses him again and hopes it conveys exactly how much the assumption appeals to him.

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading…be safe today!
> 
> Unsexy reminders: There’s a lot of ways to fuck up breath play. Don’t go into it halfcocked and damage someone’s trachea, y’all.
> 
> (Though, fun fact, I definitely got picked up by the neck a while back and it Sucked™ but also I didn’t die.)
> 
> Americans, don't forget Super Tuesday is this week, vote, vote, vote!!


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